i had a dream … joe

Password to view: NCF_1992

A few screen caps under the cut …

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About Morgan Wolfe

I write contemporary LGBTQ fiction that explores the dark & light of human love and desire. Interests: Progressive politics, visual arts, vintage illustration, mid-century design. French films, Queer cinema. Literary quotes. J'adore Paris. Ich liebe Berlin.

22 thoughts on “i had a dream … joe

  1. Bethany :
    One would be just as well off taking a fanfic in to MS Word, pressing CTRL + F and using the find and replace feature to change names before reading.

    That could work. *snickers* As for communities, well, just “inspired by…” would work. I don’t know, in my instance I don’t think what I do is even on the same level as my (admittedly redefined) understanding of fanfic. My character/s (because for some reason I wound up making like fucking five of them or something–my friend informed me last week that I made one named Donovan I completely goddamn forgot about) used Nick Cave as a starting point but depart pretty wildly from my understanding of him. Do you guys normally alter his history pre-music career, or find some stopping point within it? For instance I made different parents and whatnot for the character I have, different goals and successes. . .it’s ironic, really. Real Nick Cave wanted to be a painter and wound up becoming a musician; my character was a musician and wound up becoming a painter. I totally didn’t do that on purpose! Haha.

    I dunno. On one hand I have passing interest in presenting him (and related characters, though they’re woefully underdeveloped) to people familiar with the “model material”, because I feel as though Nick Cave fans would have a certain. . .interest that most don’t seem to (seeing as Nicky-dear neither slays dragons/vampires/demons/etc. nor fucks everything that moves, he’s considered boring by many). But then I worry that people familiar with the model would also scream “YOU’RE RUINING HIM” for various differences.

    Anyway, I’m over it, thanks. I don’t think people who do fanfic have any more of an association between fanfic character and real life dude than I do, necessarily. . .haha, when The Cat Piano came out, my first reaction was, “Yes, I can use something for a voice clip that isn’t crazy long and where he isn’t affecting a poor southern accent! Score!”

    Man, I veered off topic. I might give the community another go, anyway. I don’t know. There’s a possibility my lack of interest is simply because all the stories are set in the real world, and the real world bores me, haha.

  2. I don’t think Nixa necessarily implies slash, so much as the creative working relationship between Nick Cave and Blixa Bargeld. If anything, Nixa works as symbolic of the platonic chemistry in their work together by transcending it into a romantic concept. Art is romance of life. They obviously have a very strong relationship as both collaborators and friends, and neither have ever shied away from androgynous displays or behaviors, or ambiguous sexuality. It’s nice to see content featuring their relationship, since it is a mover of the music. I don’t see where the controversy is, and I’m quite disappointed that the blog would shy so easily from the thought of including such content.

    As for the Nixa slash, I have personally never been an admirer of fanfiction period, but I empathize with Nixa, and have grown to find it rather appealing. In fact I think I have grown to have more positive feelings about slash relating to real persons than to fictional characters. I haven’t come into contact with anyone yet within this fandom that takes the idea above and beyond and is detached from reality to a point where it becomes “creepy”.

    When you are an artist, you become an entity separate from the mundane existence of simply being human. You are no longer just a person–it is the celebrity effect, but in a less morally decrepit way and a more empowering, religious one. Nick himself I believe has expressed in interviews that his occupation as frontman and artist is a way for him to feel as though he is in some way larger than life. It’s an escape from the mundaneness that is reality.

    Wallaby hit the nail on the head. Fictional realities are the only place in the world where things exist as we’d want them to. The pairing of Nick and Blixa together couldn’t be more disassociated from just imagining two people you know engaging in sexual acts; in fact the whole point of it is that it’s known that it’s separate from the idea of them as living organisms that sleep, eat, defecate, copulate, and put on their pants in the morning the same way as every other human being. I believe the recent Batman “The Dark Knight” film said something very valuable about the moral and spiritual thirst to have unreal figures in your life. It is the same with this. It is conscious unreality for the point of empowerment. The thing that keeps it from being offensive is that the readers and writers know and like that it is separate from the actual persons.

    It is so simple to not look at something if it’s there and you don’t like it, and yet not so simple to find something to look at if you like it when it’s not. Unfortunately.

    • Bethany, thank you for the precise and thoughtful comment. Please tell the ladies at FS how much I appreciate their interest and enthusiasm in sorting out the misperceptions about Nixa fan fiction.

      My announcement was meant to encourage those who are interested and to set a few preliminary guidelines. I never expected such intense reactions. Especially since I specifically stated that we could not include fictions here due to our PG-13 rating. Unfortunately the fiction part is what was picked up and amplified.

      Let’s start over….

      I would like to create a permanent Nixa installation at this blog. For example, a gallery page with fan videos, favorite photos and screen caps, fan art, maybe pics w/silly captions. I confess to enjoying the Lolz at FS and get a lot of guilty pleasure LMAO over them. Would you consider donating a batch to us, with full credit, of course? You can upload them someplace else and I’ll link to the images. They’re hilarious. As far as the fictions, the best we can do is provide a link and a NC-17 warning. Anyone who is interested in donating or in providing an anecdote on how you came to be a member of the ‘Cult of Nixa’ please post or email me: admin(at)NickCaveFixes.com .


  3. Hahaha, oh God, I think I understand now. It has to do with my whole “I try to put myself into other people’s shoes ENTIRELY too much” thing. So I think of Nick Cave like. . .googling his name for some reason (because, y’know, famous people do that all the time in the nonsense of my imagination), and happening across some story, and consider what MY reaction would be in the situation. Like if someone wrote a story about me and someone I work with doin’ it, I’d run a scalding bath and stay in it for hours.

    So if anyone can relieve me of this thought I might be kind of on board, here. =P

      • Hehe, maybe someone needs to ask him how he feels about this stuff to comfort me. =P (Not that someone should specifically ask for my benefit. . .just, maybe that’s what I need, haha.)

        I made my first character based off of a band member when I was twelve or so, and an AFI fan. Eventually I got the chance to ask Davey about it and he said he was “flattered”, which erased what shame I had about it for a while. Of course, I’ve since realized that a. AFI sucks and b. Davey’s a bit of a raging fuckface, but hey, it made me feel good at the time.

    • It’s a bit late, but I’m sorry for hijacking. It was just something I’d been brooding over for the last few weeks, and I didn’t want to take it directly to the community for fear it’d be mistaken for trolling, or something. So I saw this and took is as an opportunity, haha. Feel free to go “OK, moving on…”

      • Don’t apologize, Jamie, life is too short. It’s yours and Andrea’s right not to like certain content. I do try and include stuff that will appeal to as many Nick Cave fans as possible and occasionally include stuff that I am interested in. You wanna talk about dorky?? OMG. Hahahaha! I have you beat by a mile. 😀

  4. I am in a bad mood, first of all.

    I, however, can’t STAND the whole slash/fanfic crap. I think it’s basically reading the sex fantasies of other people, or it just puts my role models into these situations I don’t want to read about. I know no one else really shares my opinion, but I find the whole thing tactless and gross. I know it’s not all sex, but I find it rather offensive and nauseating. That, I know, is just me, but I’ve even tried understanding it, and I just think it’s stupid. That being said, it’s your blog; do what you want, obviously. I won’t be checking that stuff out, though, but I do love the other stuff you post.

    • No worries – we don’t be doing it here. There have already been problems with posts that dare to talk about Nick’s dancing style for godsake. What was I thinking in imagining that women would be allowed to have their own space and not be slagged off about it.

      Fear and loathing at Nick Cave Fixes…

      BTW: Why are you a member of Ficcing Seeds if fan/fic disgusts you? Do they know your true feelings? Jesus. (I don’t really wanna know.)

  5. I have written some fanfic and I don’t understand it either! 😉 For me it started when I wrote an short article about the thing in a blog, I had to try it myself. And once I had done it I just kept on doing it, it’s addictive. It’s almost freaky really! 😛

    Of course I would love a Nixa-page!

  6. Gotta say, not a chick thing, it creeps me out re: Nixa. But it’s something I’d like to understand I guess. I feel like an asshole when I have such a negative reaction to fanfic and whatnot, because I do roleplaying with a character that looks like Nick and have had the same sort of “what’s wrong with you!?” reaction from people about that, and that’s no fun. But it really does bother me. I get it on a level of “this guy is attractive and this guy is attractive, so I’d like to imagine them doin’ it”, but fail to understand much beyond that. From the perspective of an RPer I don’t understand why it has to be Nick Cave and Blixa Bargeld and not their likenesses, I guess.

    • In a way, it is just their likenesses being dealt with. We get to work with established characters, communities, etc. It’s not much different than writing fanfic about books and television shows in that way. Most of us recognize it’s not real, and mean no disrespect to our subjects. It’s all in fun…

      • If it’s their likenesses, why do you use the same name? That’s what bugs me about it, using the same name. I had little. . .fanficcy type fantasies (innocent ones though) when I was around thirteen, but once I kind of twisted together my music and role playing obsessions, I made characters in their likeness (though the Nick-character’s the only one who stuck, I’ve been playing him for 8-9 years), I never really had that. . .compulsion? I don’t know. Using the same name gives this strange like. . .sense, as though you’re playing puppets with real people in your imagination, or something. Using a different name gives more creative freedom, I find. I just can’t get into any sort of fanfic – with fictional -or- real people – because I’m constantly thinking, “What the hell? S/he wouldn’t act like that!” With real people it’s especially impossible to really write what they would or wouldn’t do, and it seems. . .creepy, to me, to even try.

        Haha, I was actually a member of the ficcing seeds community briefly, because I’m a picture fiend and the numerous picspams made me practically pass out with joy, and I also thought I might find someone to convert to RPing with me or something *snicker*. Then I realized the name of the community wasn’t err, for decoration, and departed rather quickly. I doubt I’ll ever be a convert to it but I really would like not having such a reaction to it, it makes me feel like an asshole, like I said.

        • It ceases to be their likeness when it ceases to be them. It is not about the people, but them as artistic entities. In writing, building and portraying your character is a very intensive process that requires a lot of time spent on introduction and description. If we are all on the same page that the likeness is what appealing, I do not understand trying to disassociate it from them any further, only to build it back up again painstakingly.

          I have been appointed by the rest of the group to say that for most it is already disassociated from the actual people without something so small as a name change. The celebrity effect–they become artistic entities in our minds, not breathing organisms subject to the common cold and needing to restock their fridges weekly.

          • I just still don’t understand why, when it’s acknowledged that, when someone’s writing fanfiction, they’re basically writing their interpretation of someone’s artistic personality, why it’s got to be “Nick Cave”. That distinction really is important to me, and it’s a simple change–fuck, I couldn’t think of a proper name and just gave my character a different surname (Nick being a common name with no particular association–fuck, it’s my grandfather’s name too!). I do understand the appeal in kind of. . .building a character up from a particular body of creative work, and piecing together a personality through interviews, etc.. I get everything but the use of their actual names. That’s where the disconnect is. The gay thing, that doesn’t necessarily need to be something I “get”, because it’s just a matter of what people find interesting and what they don’t. The vague character’s just more interesting to me straight I guess. Whatever, that’s perfectly subjective and doesn’t even need to be a central part of the argument.

            But yeah, wouldn’t it make more sense to call the characters in your fanfic by other names? Maybe, to keep “in theme” so to speak, they would be names within the “universe”. . .for instance, I’ve got a sort of evil demon-possessed thing I call Vixo, to make the connection apparent.

            I’m steadily realizing that this tiny, tiny change would shift my comfort level dramatically. Keeping the names just kind of. . .changes something, to me. Even though the consensus is that the fanfic Nick Cave and actual Nick Cave are separate in the writers’ minds, that doesn’t seem entirely accurate when they’re called the same thing. Heh, I could understand if Nick Cave was a stage name or something, maybe. . .

            Thanks for the input though, I think I’m getting a bit closer to my goal of not reacting with repulsion at fanfic.

          • My initial question for that proposition is one of convenience. Where do people gather to search out stories featuring the likeness of Nick Cave and Blixa Bargeld? Once it becomes the author’s creation, it takes on additional attributes that are certainly separate from the idealizations of these people. Would one go about creating a specific community for this? How would you advertise it without using the names of the persons? And again, unless you state that it is supposed to be identical to Nick and Blixa themselves, why would you want to dedicate so much time to capturing their essence in writing each time you begin a story? Why not then just do something completely original instead of making copies, disguising them, and then trying to make it obvious that they are copies again?

            I just don’t understand, if the point remains that it be based on their likeness, the reason of the deconstruction, only to piece it back together with intents of having it almost exactly as it already was. It seems like you attach a feeling of guilt to it because they are actual persons, and that is harder for you to come to terms with the fantasy aspect unless you do something to show outwardly that it is disassociated? But, as I said, this is an excessive step for most of the readers and writers of this material.

            One would be just as well off taking a fanfic in to MS Word, pressing CTRL + F and using the find and replace feature to change names before reading.

  7. Greetings, Friends!

    Enjoy this latest video upload of I Had a Dream, Joe. It is one of my all time favorites. Lately, I’ve been watching quite a few. Classic Bad Seeds. Good for the soul. 🙂


    Design: I may not change the design scheme of Nick Fixes. Aside from the fact that I am comfortable with the current theme, which features a wide format, I don’t have time to reformat every post. Pending…

    Pages: I’ve added pages to the ‘Special Topic Pages’ list located on the sidebar. The titles are self-explanatory. Some of the concert galleries will not be restored because the video clips are no longer available. *The Halloween Fix page has been edited and re-formatted, and includes the list of goodies from Azbest. More ‘special topic’ pages are on the way …

    Videos: We have VideoPress until May. This post of I Had a Dream is a good example of the quality that is possible with this WordPress feature. We have a few more months to decide whether we will keep it.

    Currently, I am testing Vimeo as a 3rd party host. So far, I like it, but I am not sold as yet. If we go with Vimeo, videos will be hosted there and embedded here, the same way as we do YouTube clips. However, you will enter a password to view. I’m happy to post the passwords here at Fixes right alongside the clip for immediate viewing. Embed and download options will be disabled and I will continue watermarking with a small logo. Videos will not be available for viewing at Vimeo or anywhere else unless they are pirated. In that case, we will cease posting them.

    Photos: I am working on it. Pending….

    Content: We have expanded our forum to accomodate Blixa/EN fans. There is a multi-page installation on the sidebar under ‘Special Topics’.

    NOTE: The Blixa blog is built and content is being added. I hope to open by the weekend. Announcement pending. YAY!

    *Additional Fixes content: For a long time I’ve considered adding a ‘special page’ for Nixa fans.

    On edit: On second thought, let’s not go there. There are other communities who are already devoted to this topic and I don’t see a way to avoid problems. No time/patience for it. Sorry, Morgan

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